Give Yourself Permission To Fail

I don’t know how many people that I have come across in this life that have told me, “I have failed at xyz, why try again? Why should I try anything new?”
My heart aches at the utter defeat that I hear in their voice. Failure and even the thought of it is a solid trauma response for some people.

I want to be able to understand the concept that the thought of failure brings fear or feelings of hopelessness. I too have my trigger trauma responses, in other areas in my life, but when it comes to trying, even with the possibility of failure, I am all in.

I think perhaps failingin my life, in front of many, while I was still young cured me of the fear of trying and failing as an adult. I saw that I was okay, that life went on, and I learned so much in the process.

Like the time I was on stage in front of hundreds if not thousands of people, and stumbled over my words at a Portland Miss Teen Pageant, not once but multiple times. That moment taught me that I don’t have to be afraid of the opinion of others. The Lord used this experience for me to feel free to speak in front of multitudes of classes of children about their ability to say no and stand up for themselves if someone tries to hurt them. To be able to be on the platform of churches and share my heart, or to sing on worship teams for years, even though at times it was messy. I now lead a broadcast and inspire others to shine their light. Do I feel capable? Of course not! Do I know that I mess up? Absolutely! I already know that I am not the most graceful person, and so do those all around me. It isn’t a secret. That is okay, I don’t need to be perfect, and neither do you to step out. You don’t need to be anything other than just what you are, who you are called to be, and being bold is a part of that. Be bold for HE is with you. The God of the heavens and the earth thought enough of you that he placed you on this earth for your purpose. Your purpose alone and nobody else. There is trying, learning, failing, and success.

I have learned over the years, that there are times that the Lord calls me to do what I feel is impossible, and that I am completely inadequate. so that He can show up. I have done many things, that in my own power would never have been able to do.

Then there were times that I know that I was called and walked out in obedience, and the outcome looks nothing like I expected. It was an utter flop and failure! I have even asked, “God, did I hear you correctly? I failed so badly!”

Then, comes, his assurance, “You are basing your success on your standards, not the outcome that I needed to happen. You were willing to be stretched and follow my leading, now watch what happens.” Sure enough, I see His hand use the small seed that I had sown and create a beautiful harvest. Even though I could not see what was coming, He did!

Failure may happen. We may be called to do something that we don’t know what the outcome will be, and we may feel like we failed. We may step out when the timing is not right and it looks deflating. BUT we can look at failing as an opportunity to say that we have tried and have learned exactly not what to do again. I have failed… so what. I may fail again…so what. What is the worst that can happen? I look foolish? Well, I have already done that!
But if ONE person is touched by stepping out of my comfort zone, it is worth it to risk failure. If ONE person is sparked to try because they see how they can do it better, it was worth the risk of failure. If I have learned something, it was worth the risk of failure.

If I don’t risk failure, or if I don’t have an attitude of ‘so what’, I will never see the success of the dreams buried deep in my heart. They will remain dormant because I chose the path of safety.
The greatest truth is that God has called us to be victorious. Philippians 4:13 says it all, ”  I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me”.

We may feel like we are failing, but we are in process of arriving. When we seek HIM first, He will guide us to the steps of preparing for the road ahead. He will set us up for success. We will not fail, with GOD leading our way, to walk out the plan that he has for our lives. EVERYTHING we walkthrough can be used for His glory. Failure ahead? Maybe there will be, but so what!!!

Hope in Times of Uncertainty

Epesians 1:18 – I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people,

Hope is a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen.
There is no doubt that in some ways we are living in one of our worst moments this generation has experienced. We have been hit with the ugliest fight in politics that I have ever seen. There are enormously heavy hidden things coming out that are often too much for the mind to absorb. We have had unprecidented natural desasters, wild fires, and hard hits in the economy (again).
Not to mention the required isolation during COVID-19, and an increase in major depression and suicide.

There is so much on the shoulders of mankind in 2020. So how can we walk in hope with the weight that is baring down on us?

We must stir our hope up!

We stir up hope by walking in an expectation for a positive future. We stir up the truth that we will see the victory. We rejoice. We declare and walk with our head on what we are expecting rather than what we are having thrown at us.

We must not look at these times, and sit back with hands thrown up declaring it is hopeless. It is not hopeless!!!
There is so much in these situations to learn and grow. Businesses are being birthed as people are home and needing to redesign their income. People at home are becoming more creative, getting things accomplished that before they had no time available for. Families are valuing their time together in new ways. We are now longing for true connection, that without COVID-19 we allowed to go dormant. Communities are coming together to help those that have faced loss and disaster.

It is important to remember that in our waiting God is there. We are not forgotten. We have a purpose and in this time some of us are just now awakening to what that purpose is.

HOPE– Let us pursue with expectation God hears us and meets us where we are at.
Jeremiah 29:12- Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.

HOPE-Let us pursue with expectation we DO have a purpose in all this. We have been created for such a time as this. Jeremiah 29:11- For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

HOPE– Let us pursue with expectation the kind of person that we want to be on the other side of this weighty and heavy time in history.
Colossians 3:14- And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”

HOPE – Let us pursue with expectation that there is a victory ahead of us. We will overcome and be stronger because of what we have grown through.
1 Peter 5:10-  And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.

Hope moves us forward. It pushes into our next. When we are feeling all is lost or we are miserable in our situation, it is up to us to look to where our HOPE comes from. We cannot afford to stay dormant and hide. Others need us and we will not function in our best if we hang our head down and walk in hopelessness.
Psalm 121:1- I lift up my eyes to the hills– where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.

One way to generate hope is to invest in others. With Covid-19 this may mean some creativity. I have seen all kinds of online support groups and opportunities to connect.
Book clubs, bible studies, hobby interests and ministry pages. There is opportunity even at home to socialize and take the time to instil hope into others. Stirring hope for others stirs hope within our own hearts. Ask yourself if you are called to contribute in a new way to a social outlet. Perhaps start something that has been on your heart for some time. Now is the time to go after it!

God is a God of HOPE. He genertes hope within us as we give thanksgiving.
Start today, thanking for that which you expect and want to see.

I just know we will begin to see great things!

Worthy-Worthiness-Worth

 

I have been hearing the word worthy, thrown around a lot this last week. Many of the scriptures I read state that HE is worthy of praise. But what does the word say about us being worthy? What is worthiness?

Definition- Worthiness: The quality of being good enough, suitable or the quality of deserving attention or respect.

Can we as christians be worthy ? Can we be good enough, suitable, deserving attention or respect? Is being born again enough to make us worthy?

 

Colossians 1:9-14 ESV-

And so, from the day we heard, we have not ceased to pray for you, asking that you may be filled with the knowledge of his will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, So as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God; being strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy;  giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light.  He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, ¹⁴ in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.

 

I feel strongly that God cleanses us and makes us worthy when we come to Him and repent, turning AWAY from our sin. We are new in Him.

But we can walk in a life that is unworthy and unpleasing to God. We have that choice. We need to continually walk in  a manner that is pleasing to him to be worthy (suitable), We can not continue to walk in the filth and garbage and expect that we will feel worthy. Each and every thing we do contrary to the word of God is not pleasing to him, it is not bearing fruit that is good if we are not doing good works.

If we do works that are contrary to the word of God our fruit will be contrary to the word of God. Rotten and filthy. Not a good fruit to bring joy, endurance and patience. Not a fruit that is worthy to bring to the throne.

You can walk any way you would like but when you walk contrary to the way of the Lord and then you claim to be His child, you are going to feel the guilt and shame. It is going to follow you in all that you do, there will be a seperation.

There is no BIG crime and LITTLE crime in the Kingdom, every thing that you fill your life with that is not good fruit bearing will produce bad fruit in your walk in some way.

I am not talking about a mess up, a slip up moment, I am talking about when you WALK in a life that goes against the word of God, you will not be upright and worthy of Him in your mind. He sees and knows the real you, the side of you that others do not see.

You can’t feel worthy when you are walking in a way that is not pleasing to the Lord.
This is conviction in your heart. A call to repent and turn away. When you turn away , you are not to look back at what you did, that was the old you.

SO if you repented (turned away from your old sin) and you  came to the Lord and gave Him your life, walking up right with Him, yet you feel so dirty and unworthy still,  THAT is the enemy. That is condemnation, making you look back at who you were and what you did. The enemy trying to make you feel dirty and unworthy to walk with the Lord.

You are called to not pick up your old identity. You are made whole and new in Him. You are enough, He knew you before you were born, He knew every misstep and misdeed and still chose to call you to Him, cleanse you and love you. He feels you are enough. We give thanks to the Father because HE qualifies us.

If you want Jesus and ALL that He has for you, you must turn away from your old man, turn away from the walk of sin and destruction, not just when it suits you but completely.

So these are my thoughts tonight. I know many may disagree,  some believe you can do whatever you want and walk with the Lord, but this is my heart on the matter.

Point blank … Sometimes it is true, you are unworthy….. but you have the choice to make it a lie; repent and walk worthy in the Lord.

 

The Lion within

                                                           Proverbs 28:1 The wicked run away when no one is chasing them, but the godly are as bold as lions.

There are so many battles we face moment by moment and day by day. I have had seasons where I just wanted to throw my hands up and take my place under the covers. But God said NO MORE. He has called me to fight my battles ahead and when I am weary He says, “discover your lion within and let out your war cry!”

“But God,” I say, “there is no strength in me, I see no lion but rather a kitten wanting to nap the days away.” To which He replies, ” NO MORE, I am in you, that is a lie, let out your war cry!”

I see a picture in my mind of Aslan. A soft and gentle lion. Loving to the children visiting Narnia, but the moment He is ready for battle he let’s out his powerful mighty roar.

There is a shifting in the atmosphere with that strength. That roar changes things!

I have begun to exercise my faith and let out my war cry. I am beginning to say “no more will I listen to lies. No more will I sit quietly while the enemy tries to steal my peace.”

I have a choice on where my mind focuses, I have a choice on letting my roars overtake the whispers of the enemy. I am bold, I am courageous, I can do ALL things through Christ who gives me strength.

Challenge this day my friends, will you let out your war cry? Will you take your stand in the battle and win your ground over your spiritual enemies.?

The Lord is mighty,  the Lion within.

 

 

A quiver full of blessings

Our children are an inheritance of the Lord, a blessing and a joy.

Most days as my boys were growing up I knew this, however, there were those days I felt I was doing everything wrong and surely God made a mistake giving them to me. Maybe I should ship them to Bermuda.

There were days of stress, anger and shouting. Days of rebellion, tugging and shoving.

Then, it would all shine and be gloriously amazing and I would think we had passed the hurdle, only to see another up ahead.

I have friends that are in the midst of the highs and lows of parenting these days and my heart is to hopefully encourage. Those moments of frustrations and complete hair pulling stress will pass. Hold fast onto the word of the Lord that our children are our reward! I know in the midst of life, business and the drama you are exhausted beyond belief many days. More importantly the Lord knows this and as you cry out for strength He will grant it to you. I also know that there will be a day, when you look back and you say, thank you Lord, this was a great season and I am so thankful where you have brought us.

I truly wish that when my boys were in the midst of their craziness that I held my joy a little bit better, and a lot longer. I wish they saw less of a frazzled and anxious mom. I know that we are human and that we will make mistakes but now in the end of the game of raising the boys I see those things that once seemed so big and I was sure was going to ruin them, were in reality their growing.

Just like the big grown up adults we are, children need to discover the Lord and His tugging themselves. They need to feel the conviction of their wrongs and joys of obedience. The only way they will discover this for themselves is to live life. Making mistakes, following their flesh and acting in their human selves. What a joy to know that we get to help them along and learn how to listen to God’s voice early. I wish this dawned on me a lot sooner than it did. Maybe I would have enjoyed the journey in the midst of the junk a bit more.

Now as my boys are grown adults I hold fast to the word of the Lord. They are my reward. I am so blessed by the young men they have become. They are following their OWN paths in this life, I know I aimed for my mark and released each one into this world with the truth that they will impact the kingdom of God.  They are my quiver full of blessings. They are my joy.  Be encouraged my friend and count it all great joy, these children in your hands, are here for just a moment, then they will soar.

Psalm 127:3-5 

Behold, children are a gift of the LORD, The fruit of the womb is a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one’s youth. How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them; They will not be ashamed When they speak with their enemies in the gate

Don’t let the Dream Die

 

So many of us have dreams of succeeding by pursuing and exploring something born within us. For myself my dreams are to write my children’s books, to finish a work I have begun with friends and to open my own shop one day just to name a few.

My husband has shared his dreams with me over the years as well as my friends and family. The interesting thing about dreams, there is an ebb and flow to them while you wait for the fruition. There are times that your dream is on fire, burning within you and you take steps towards achieving your hearts desire. Then life happens, distractions may come, or in my case illness arises and then your dream goes dormant for a while. The embers are still burning but the dream is not being stoked and tended to for a season. If left for too long and forgotten the dream may even die.

However, the interesting thing with dreams the second you take time to acknowledge them, and get other things out-of-the-way, that fire ignites again and burns even brighter.

I find these seasons of dormancy give me a clearer picture of how to obtain the reality of my dream. I gain more direction, I reflect on what worked or did not work and I research more once the light is reignited. Sometimes when we have worked for our dreams and we don’t see the immediate results we will lay it down again. Rather than getting discouraged that I laid down those dreams, I am going to reflect on the fact that I am at this moment closer to obtaining my dream than I have ever have been in history. Why? Because I have learned much and today is a new day. I will not let go of what has been promised to me. I will WORK towards that goal. A dream that is part of our life plan should never be allowed to die completely. Take the time to reflect on those dreams that would spark such passion and excitement in you.  For once a dreamer always a dreamer you will be. You just have to begin again.

 

A scripture the Lord gave me years ago, regarding some dreams on my heart that had been left to die….
Jeremiah 33:3-  ‘Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.’

 

I AM all this and more!

 My in-laws passed down some valuable lessons to my husband during prayer time when he was a child. My husband then passed these very true facts down to our children and I over heard and learned as well.

 I still to this day need to make an effort to remember what my position is, what I have, and who I am in Christ.

 I AM above and not beneath.

I AM a winner not a loser.

I AM a believer not a doubter.

I AM blessed coming in and blessed going out.

I AM able to do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

I AM the head and not the tail.

I AM what God says I am and I can DO what God says I can do.

I AM filled with love, power and a sound mind not a spirit of fear! I have the mind of Christ.

 When I stop and remember the truth rather than what my moment would have me believe it is then that I know I blessed. I see my atmosphere around me change. It is very hard to walk around in depression when I am speaking life over my home, children, husband, loved ones and self. It is not hard to have hope when I focus on HIM and the fact He is always faithful.

 It has taken a long time for me to believe these truths about myself. But truths they are and I will not forget them. 

 ALL situations will work out of for the good of those who love Him. I KNOW the Lord will work all things out for my good, because I love Him.

 I look at all the ways there has been grace in my life and all the way things already have worked out for good. I can trust that it will continue. I am one blessed gal.

 

 Challenge this day my friend: Even if you do not believe that YOU ARE, speak these truths, until the truth becomes alive in you. Speak the truth I AM until you ARE. We can do EVERYTHING He created us to do!

 Ephesians 2:10- 

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

 (NIV)