Enough

writingforjoy 021

I am enough

He makes me enough

I am what He has called me to be

I will accomplish what He lays before me

I have all that I need

He will guide my hands

He will guide my feet

I am enough

He makes me enough

I am what He has called me to be

 

These words came to me in song tonight as we drove home from the Oregon Coast. We had taken a quick day trip and over and over, God showed me His amazing abilities through His creation. If He created such amazement, why do I doubt what He can do in me?

God  gave me the words… An artist thinks with his soul. I don’t think in my natural brain when I am creating. But let me tell you as soon as I am done, all my own flesh natural thoughts come my way. “It is not good enough.” ” I am so embarrassed by showing this side of me.” And on and on my thoughts will come, each time I complete something the Lord lays on my heart, and I doubt the sharing.

His words to me today ring so true; An artist thinks with his soul. I need to let my words of destruction and discouragement  get out of my way. They need to stop plaguing me after the fact.

I will meditate on the words of this song He had given to me, and I will be thankful that I am just as He has created me to be. Who am I to deny that what God has done is good? I am enough in His eyes. I am capable in His view and I will no longer live the lie that I am unable. I will do, what He lays before me and that is enough.

Pray for others

I have a friend and every time I greet her and am embraced in one of her hugs, I just get a wonderful sense of peace. She can calm my fears with a simple prayer and encourage my heart when she shares Gods truth.

A few weeks ago, as she gave me a hello hug, I saw a picture for her. This picture stuck with me for a while, and when we had the prophetic paint night I painted it real quick for her.

22788830_10214421356712728_1593463403706495168_n

I saw clearly that as my friend covered all of her hurting and broken loved ones in prayer, the spirit of God bubbles forth within her and He brings about victory to those that are surrounded by seas of sorrow.
They turn from dead and dying to life full of the Spirit.
While my friend may feel many times her prayers are not answered, God says “they are not answered yet, but I know they are there! I hear your prayers. In my time you wills see the overflowing waters of life. Keep praying.”

So as you are praying for victory over a loved ones situation or life. Rest assured the Father hears! He knows your heart as you come to the throne room on behalf of others.

Recently I was woken from a dream that someone very dear to me was in danger. I had no other knowledge or thought on this path as I laid to sleep the night before. But God woke me,and I knew I was called to pray. I don’t know the outcome yet, but I can rest in the knowledge that God heard my cries and already He has begun a work protecting those loved ones.

Don’t give up. Keep pushing on faithful one. Pray for others.

 Colossians 1: 9-13

For this reason also, since the day we heard of it, we have not ceased to pray for you and to ask that you may be filled with the knowledge of His will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, so that you will walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, to please Him in all respects, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God; strengthened with all power, according to His glorious might, for the attaining of all steadfastness and patience; joyously read more.
giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified us to share in the inheritance of the saints in Light. For He rescued us from the domain of darkness, and transferred us to the kingdom of His beloved Son,

 

Ephesians 3: 14-21  

For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name, that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man,
so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; and that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to all the fullness of God. Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever. Amen.

A New Day

Inspired! An amazing weekend in Dundee Oregon taking part in the Awaken the Dawn.
This is a prophetic painting and song that began and came forth this weekend. Spent time in the Lord tonight finishing it up. I am so thankful He has chosen to give me a NEW DAY.  I will sing it, shout it, paint it, and dance. My arms wide open to recieve the gift He has begun!

21768357_10214299046975061_7971022588531362410_n

I’ve seen your tears

I’ve heard your cries

I’ve felt your heartache

It’s time to dry those eyes

It’s a new day…. it’s a new day…a new day for you

I’ve seen your brokenness

I’ve heard your screams

I’ve felt your loneliness 

It’s time to let go and dream

It’s a new day… it’s a new day… a new day for you

No more bitterness

No more shame

No more hatred

No more pain

It’s a new day… it’s a new day… a new day for you

 

The smudge on the mirror

1275269_10202034555370436_429223763_o

Last night I had a dream of a perfectly shined mirror, with a smudge of dirt across  a portion of it. I woke up and immediately thought about how that smudge can ruin the perfect shine, it does not matter how clean the rest of the mirror was, with a mark across it the mirror was messy. On more prayer and reflection God pointed out that I can not fully see my self as He sees me, when I have a smudge blocking my vision.

The smudges can come in all kind of forms. Lies that others have told us, sling some mud on the mirror. Disobedience or sin in our life, sling some more mud up there. Keeping shame and worthlessness on our shoulders, yep more mud.

Instead of cleaning the filth off the mirror, we may try to see through it, or maneuver around it. Our vision is blocked. God knows how He sees our worth. He knows how He sees our gifting and abilities. He can even see where we will go when we have our clear vision and take the steps before us.

The enemy wants nothing more than to keep our vision blocked, but God says, “it is time to clean up those areas and wipe the mirror clean.  See yourself as I see you, as I have created you. I am HE and I KNOW what you are and what your  worth. Take of the mud that has been slung before you, that either you or others have placed in front of you. I give you all you need to see clearly, it is time to wipe it all away!”

A scripture that sits on my heart as I ask, Lord how do I clean this mirror???

Psalm 139: 23-24  Search me O God and know my heart; try me and know my anxieties; and see if there are any wicked ways in me and lead me in the way everlasting.

Be encouraged brothers and sisters. He has so much for you to see in yourselves that you have yet to discover! I am so excited to see what He has for me to behold.

Psalm 51:10- Create in me a clean heart o God and renew a steadfast Spirit within me.

The Spirit reminds me as I cry out;

Psalm 139: 13-14 For you formed my inward parts, you covered me in my mother’s womb. I will praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Marvelous are your works, and that my soul knows very well.

Be encouraged brothers and sisters. He has so much for you to see in yourselves that you have yet to discover! I am so excited to see what He has for me to behold.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Coming home

15895340_10211636743339134_2748151376846025030_n

Lately I had found myself detached from things, it hasn’t felt bad in any way, just detached. I haven’t  felt depressed or numb, just off. Granted this has been a ROUGH month of illness, but I was disconnected.
This morning I turned on my worship music on my way to work, which I have not done in some time as sensory overload is crazy during illnesses for me. My spirit just jumped. It was as if I had a nice soothing drink of cool water after wandering the desert.

For me when I come to my Jesus, it is as if I am coming home into the open arms of my father. There is something so sweet about the presence of God. Every part of my heart filled and joy bubbles forth. It was my ah ha moment, I had been missing my worship and praise time.

I was feeling a little edgy this afternoon, antsy so to speak, and again I turned on the worship music and instantly my joy was bubbling.

You may hear people describe the presence of the Lord and wonder what that means. I guess everyone’s experience may be different, but for me it is as if I am a child jumping into the arms of my parent. I come home and I sit at the table. We share and I am blessed. A relationship with Jesus is not one way. It shouldn’t be, as we can come and fellowship and rejoice in the one that gives us life.

My sweet cousin was dealing with depression and my having revelation today, I don’t wish to give a quick answer , yet truly the worship and praise has brought me from those depths more times than I could ever possibly count.

He is a good good father and I will rejoice in my salvation!

Zechariah 1:3-
“Therefore say to them, “Thus says the Lord of host, “Return to Me,” declares the Lord of hosts, “that I may return to you, “says the Lord of hosts.

Deuteronomy 4:30-
“When you are in distress and all these things have come upon you, in the latter days you will return to the Lord your God and listen to His voice.

Sirens

In the wee hours of the morning, I woke to what sounded like emergency vehicle sirens. This is not an unusual sound around my house, as I live on a busy HWY. But the sound was not ceasing. After a while I left my room to see if I actually was hearing sirens, as they sounded off in the distance and were not getting louder, just constant. As soon as I left my room the sound was gone. I laid my head back on the pillow to rest and the siren started again. I asked the Lord, ‘what is with the siren?’ and I felt my spirit leap, it is time to pray for those that are in danger of missing my call or in the midst of attacks of the enemy. So I began to pray. I only had one on my heart when I began and I prayed for them. Then the siren sounded again. I prayed and then again a siren would sound. This went on for some time. Then I realized the siren had gone. I was able to rest my head and with peace, sleep again.

This is a new experience for me and let me tell you the crazy thing. Lately I have been having my own struggles. Much of the time I have been pushing the Lord down and away as I have been frustrated and just restless in my own walk. I have asked and asked and pleaded with the Lord for certain areas and I feel the silence is all I receive. I know this is a horrible thing to say for a christian, but even in pursuing He seemed so silent I hadn’t wanted to continue at times. But let’s be real, it is something many deal with, I know I am not alone. There are often those seasons of wilderness and from that comes growth.

I just find it amazing that in my season of silence, He made himself known and called me out. He called me to seek Him and to pray. When I had began to wonder why I was not hearing from Him, He showed me, I still do. He is taking me to new territory, more precise territory. I will listen and I will call out. I shudder to think of not answering those emergency calls. For  I know how faithful He has been to hear me in my darkest deepest hour. He has given me a voice to cry out for those that won’t cry out for themselves. To seek their survival despite their deaf ears. Oh Lord He who has ears LET HIM HEAR.

My cry today,  ” Let it be me Lord, that does not miss your call. I have wondered the wilderness long enough and don’t want to lay in a land that is barren.”

When you feel a tugging my friend on your heart or a desperate cry in your very being, that is the Lord calling you to Him. Give a listen. Today may be your day for new territory.

My flesh …. was once the victor…. but not the final outcome!

I hit the wall again. I was so fearful that the past was going to repeat itself, when I woke up in pain all over my body. I cried out to God, “I thought I was beyond this! Please don’t allow me to regress! What is going on?” I cried in private, in front of my boss, and was embarrassed at such a weakened state.

I rested, and rested some more. I stretched slowly, watched my diet, used medication, muscle rubs, made sure to get my vitamins and slowly regained strength. I can sense that I am still unable to work like I had, I see it was sending me into a tail spin. I was not ready. Yet it really brought a full picture of what I was struggling with.

I was fleshing out. I was so burdened and in pain, that for a moment I quaked and allowed depression, despair and frustration to hang like a dark cloud on top of the light He placed in my life.

I find it interesting that we can walk in the flesh or walk in the Spirit. In the flesh, I wanted to completely give up. I am reminded of the scripture…
Galatians 5:17-  For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want.

I wanted to despair, complain, feel sorry for myself and fear. ALL these things are contrary to what is right in the spirit.

The meaning of FLESH-The soft substance of a human or animal.

Flesh is the SOFT part. The part that doesn’t want to contend, to fight, to stand for what freedom I have already gained. By walking in my flesh… I was soft.  Why wouldn’t the enemy want to keep me in that state? He would obtain all the victory. The victory over what God HAS done in me.

My flesh had won for a moment. I kicked and cried and screamed. Yet that is not the end of my story, my outcome is victory over the flesh and moment. I will rise up and sing, not because of my limits, but because of my opportunities and new strength.

Now, I will not be unwise with my abilities, BUT I will not let my spirit be weak because of  the condition of my body. I will walk not by sight, but by the SPIRIT of the Lord. I will walk confidently that He carries me and I would never ever go back to what I once was. He has done a work and isn’t near finished yet. He is SO good and I give Him all the glory. So for my fleshing out, whining, complaining, wanting to give up moment. I repent, and turn away from that lie. I will walk in HIS truth, and that is… He is an everlasting God and does not grow faint, He does not grow weary, He is the defender of the weak, and comforts those in need. He will lift me up and carry me and I can say …. “HE IS GOOD!”

He’s COMING!

We visited the zoo yesterday as a family. I do believe I had the greatest joy watching the little children more than looking at the variety of animals. I now have almost grown boys and to see the delight in the young faces was such a blessing.

One particular little boy had his faced pressed against the glass waiting for the sea-lion. His mama had been waiting with him for a while, watching the flipping pattern the sea-lion was enjoying as he communicated through the glass with the toddler.

With her hand held out, the mama asked the little boy ” are you ready to go to the polar bears now?”
The little boy said, “no I am waiting for the otter!” In a sweet expectant voice and he turns to the glass and exclaims, “He is coming!”

When the sea-lion pressed his nose to the glass face to face with the boy he gasped in awe, then as the sea-lion moved above the surface, his tail made a swoosh in front of the boys face as he moved on up to the top of the water and the boy giggled with glee. This continued a few times and each time the boy shouted and giggled, “HE’s COMING!” Each visit left the boy with joy.

 

954882_10202126221862041_1158840450_n

Mama held out her hand and told him it was time to move on to the polar bears. This moment of joy stuck with me as we moved along as well. We walked on and the polar bears were sleeping, at a distant. Nothing to see. No glee from the youngster. Just the knowledge that this was a polar bear. Then as the mama was walking ahead to the next animal, while her head was turned for just a second, she did not see the boy look back towards the sea lions and sigh.

How many times do I have an opportunity to examine the joys in my life, only to move on to the ‘next’ things? Do I engage in my moments of joy taking each moment at its full or do I press on and miss them altogether?

On Sunday at church we sang a song that I grew up singing as a child.  It was an old song and while my children’s generation may roll their eyes at the style… I was just bouncing with glee of the truths of the words and the great memory of myself as a child singing at church with a parent on each side. I was joyful in that moment, but my mind wanted to wander on the next thing. My parents were no longer together. How quickly I could have allowed my rejoicing in the Lord to evaporate.

This is the song we sang and this week I will continue to let it be alive in my heart. I will stop and declare just as that little one … HE IS COMING. I know my God will greet me each morning and walk every step with me throughout the day.

I will enter his courts with thanksgiving in my heart

I will enter his courts with praise

I will say this is the day that the LORD HAS MADE

I will rejoice and be glad in it

La La Land???

There is so much going on in the world. Honestly there always has been, but often times the happenings we see now, point to the end times. What many believe is linked to even greater turmoil, censorship, government control, financial disaster like never seen, system set up to take away our ability to buy and sale, and great persecution of christians.

I want to encourage those, following the media and seeing all the turmoil all over the world; do not let your focus be on the concerns of this world, leading you to fear and anger.

A joyful life is not obtained walking in fear, anger, hatred, strife and anxiety.

Over and over it states in the word; do not fear, cast your cares on the Lord, do not be anxious for anything, whatever is good and right think upon these things and many other scriptures that confirm, He is to be our focus, not what we see around us.

These scriptures confirm again and again; yes we should be aware, but not consumed. Yes we should share with others, but not fear what is to come. There is an urgency, I understand that, but if you are being robbed of your peace and joy, then the focus may be skewed and leaning away from the GOOD of our Lord towards the destruction of the enemy.

I would also like to point out that while we see many things come to pass, there are many more prophesies still to be fulfilled.

When I was a child, many thought the end was near. When my mother was a child, many thought the end was near. When my grandmother was a child, many thought the end is near. All the way back to the bible days, many, thought the end was near.

I am one that believes all things in scripture will come to pass, but I am also one that is not fretting the day, the hour, or the mess to proceed it.

Maybe I live in la la land, but I prefer to walk in peace and joy. Casting my cares on the Lord and walking faithfully forward, knowing that He already knows the plans for me. At times I may not like those plans, at times I may be uncomfortable, yet I can trust that I become stronger in the battle. There may be a day that I may even be killed because I am a christian. However, I choose not to worry about these things. I am going to just know that now, in this moment, I am free to worship and rejoice and shout out that HE IS GOOD. Each day He greets me, He is with me and none shall I fear.

The scripture on my heart this morning was; My God shall supply all my need.
What is interesting is, if you go back to read all of Phillipians 4…. it clears up exactly what that need is. Even in times of trial, the need was met. Even in times of testing the need was met. The need was not a grand house, a flashy car (donkey) or even the best clothing and food, yet the need was met.

He meets our needs, so the if and when and how need not be our focus.
Just walking in gratitude that He will do all that He has said is more than enough.  We must not focus on the crashing and slamming around us, but on how great our God truly is.

Phillipians 4, mentions our role, to have those needs met. I don’t think we need to fear the world. But I do believe these things will come to pass and we need to have our heart right with the Lord.

To those that read this blog, that do not believe, one day I pray you remember these words when faced with the happenings in front of you.

Blessings dear ones~

Me a murderer?

So the last blog I mentioned having joy and joy that may be FULL.
So here is that scripture I referred to.

John 15:10-11

10.If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love.  11. These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.

Do you notice the words ‘if you keep my commandments’? I can honestly say that in my heart of the deepest depression, I thought I was keeping the commandments of the Lord. But during self-examination I saw first hand where I was not. As I completely rooted out disobedience in my life in one area, I would then have to root out another area.

It is very clear that obedience to the Lord leads to life to the full!

So let’s look at the commandment…. Thou shalt not kill.
This is a big one, what many would consider the biggest, even though not one sin is bigger than another. But you know what, I dealt with this one!

I would say to myself. I have not killed anyone! But is it not true that God looks at the condition of the heart? In my heart was I a murderer? To put it simply, yes I was.

I was so angry and hurt by an individual that was in our life for a season, I would have murdered them if it was not a sin, if I could get away with it, and the majority of the world would completely understand how I could, and may even justify such a thing for me.

Now I was walking around blindly thinking that I was not a murderer, yet in my heart the same darkness was there. Yes I could not ever act on it, but that desire drove me farther away from joy.

I had to recognize it for what it was; rebellion, hatred, bitterness, anger, unforgiveness and despair.

It does not matter the heinous act this individual had committed against our family. I could not focus on what I felt they deserved. I had to let it go.

How did I do this? Well, it was two-fold. One, I had to imagine this individual as a little child facing the same kind of terror that formed them into what they had become in adulthood. I had to recognize that they were empty, without a relationship with the Lord.

Two, I had to recognize that God loves ALL. And even though He loves all, ALL have sinned. This individual continuing in their life of sin, I know the word says vengeance is mine saith the Lord. I had to recognize that God was in control of this individual. He would be held accountable for his actions. I did not have to ‘do’ anything. I did not have to hold on to anything. I could let it go and it was okay, actually healthy to do so.

Be aware my friends there may be times in your life that you think you are blameless in a certain obedience to the Lord, but the very root of it is still there, zapping the joy from you.

Let’s look at some of the commandments to obey…

Love the Lord with all your heart.

Seek first the kingdom of God.

Love your neighbor as yourself.

How about the 10 commandments ???

I am not bringing these things to attention to condemn. But to make us more aware. To open our eyes to areas that we may have strongholds holding us back from fullness of joy. And to be very real with you, that I am human, I have struggled, I have hated…and I have repented and turned away from that grief and heartache. The Joy has returned. This was the start but each day there was another lesson in the journey 🙂

%d bloggers like this: